Wednesday 18 October 2017

What’s in a name?


Last Sunday young master Ellis Alexander Hepburn celebrated his naming day with his family and friends.
He turned one just the week before, and we ended with a truly rousing rendition of Happy Birthday, but there were lots of other elements to the occasion too, both as part of the ceremony, and the party.
I got to know Ellis’s parents a wee bit when I conducted their wedding in the Gardens at Inchyra Byre back in 2014, so was properly chuffed when they wrote asking how the Naming thing might work…which is a very good question!
 
Like our wedding and funeral ceremonies, a naming is written just for you, and will be about the child themselves in most cases, but may also be about what is important in their lives, and the lives of those around them.

They can take place anywhere, and at a time that will suit the baby or the family, or both. So Ellis’s do was at the local Bowling Club where his Granddad was a member for many years, and has been a focus of family life for a long time…
Stephanie, Ellis’s Mum even working behind the bar there when she was a student!

There is a pretty endless list of things that can happen at a naming, from words, thoughts laughs and disasters shared, to symbolic gestures, such as lighting candles, giving special gifts, or even planting a tree or making pledges or vows to the baby.
You can have a good play on the web finding things that appeal to you, but ‘usually’ we have poems, and occasionally a song, a bit about the family and the pregnancy, a bit about the Guide Parents (or Odd Parents?) if you're having any, and why they’ve been chosen, and sometimes a bit from them too, perhaps about what they are looking forward to sharing with the wee one as they grow up.
Depending on the age of the baby or child, once you know a bit about their character, it can be nice to talk about who they are becoming too, as well as how the family and parents and those around them might be instrumental in their lives at different stages. 

If the wee one has older siblings or is part of a larger or extended family group, then big sisters and brothers, cousins, step Sib's or whoever might want to take a key role in welcoming their new partner in crime.
I got together with Stephanie, Steve and wee Ellis a few months ago to talk through all that, and we came up with a shortlist of what they fancied over the cups of tea (and I even got a proper snugly baby cuddle, 'cause Ellis is friendly like that!?!), then I sent them a question list of things they’d need to think about, write or tell me, and roughed a draught out for them once I had all that - plus my notes, and we even managed to adapt their own marriage vows into their pledges to their son.

So last Sunday, that all came together with a MONSTER theme.

Awesome cake, loads of colour and a veritable ocean of children and food. There were toys and games, fizz for the grown ups and a soft play area set up once the ceremony bit was over. They also had a Time Capsule chest for everyone to put gifts into for when he's 18...so lots of imaginative and hilarious offerings in there, along with a copy of the ceremony and the certificate his parents and odd parents signed.  There was a collection too for the Sick Kids Hospital in Edinburgh, where Ellis had spent a few days as a tot.

The photos from the naming are by the lovely and very patient Kirsty McLachlan will hopefully set the scene for the wee excerpts of the ceremony I’ve put in below...link to her details is at the bottom.

A properly lovely day, and huge thanks to Steve, Stephanie and all their guests for letting me post all this, and last but not least thank you to Ellis for being so incredibly patient and cheerful at his ceremony...and I hope your Dad remembers all your guests (and your celebrant!) when you lift the Webb Ellis Trophy for the Scottish Rugby team, and he wins a monstrous huge prize on that sneaky wee wager he made at the bookies the day they officially registered your name!!

"…and we’re going to start with some advice, for Ellis from his big Cousin Skye"

Jump in puddles
Dance in the rain
Play in the mud
Don’t worry about stains

Go barefoot
Wear clothes that don’t match
Lay on the ground
Enjoy the feel of the grass

Laugh out loud
Catch a snowflake on your tongue
Enjoy every moment
Of being young
+++

Parent Pledges

Ellis, your parents promise to love & support you

give you the best of themselves
listen to you, trust you and respect you as your own person
remind you that you are not expected to be perfect
cherish & guide you
help you learn right from wrong
share with you their time and attention
show you how to respect others & the world around you
bring joy, strength and imagination to your life
encourage your dreams and help shoulder your challenges
be there whenever you need them
and laugh with you every day.

They also promise to
Let you jump in puddles, dance in the rain, climb trees and roll in the mud, 
no matter how much mess it will make
Tell you frequently how much they love you and how proud they are of you, 
 even when it makes you cringe
And, most importantly, 
never forget how lucky they are to be your parents and be the best parents they can be.

Stephanie and Steve also make the same promises to Ellis that they made to each other on their wedding day:

Ellis, today before your family and our friends
Your parents proudly acknowledge you as their son
Loving what they know of you,
and trusting what they do not yet know,
they look forward to the laughter
and falling in love with you a little more every day.
Whatever your future may hold,
they will always, always be there for you.

Stephanie and Steve, do you undertake to try and fulfil these aims?

We do

 

+++

 

Photos by

Kirsty McLachlan

http://www.kirstymclachlan.com/




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