Showing posts with label Humanist Officiant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humanist Officiant. Show all posts

Monday, 12 July 2021

Opposite Sex Civil Partnerships are here - at last!

 

It was the first of May 2009 that I had the terrifying privilege of submitting the response of the Humanist Society of Scotland (as we were then) to Petition PE1239 to the Public Petitions Committee of the Scottish Parliament – the Petition submitted by Nick Henderson, on behalf of LGBT Network.

The subject of petition was Same Sex Marriage in Scotland.

I was on the Ceremonies Committee at that point – as well as working as a celebrant – and relished taking on the research for and drafting of our response.

I spoke to everyone: colleagues, lawyers, politicians, journalists, gay folk, straight folk and ministers of religion. I read hate speech articles and interpretations of religious tracts, and learned far more of the shocking history of the fight for rights LGBT+ people, not just in the UK but around the world.

With far too much material and no clue where to start, I was now more determined than ever that I had to do everything I could to make this happen.

So, my priority focused on why the Humanist Society Scotland should put everything we had (money, time, volunteers, energy) behind the campaign to drive this forward - if it should get to a parliamentary vote.

I had to let all my research, academic & emotional engagement in the cause go - and think law, which is not my strong point, but I could write about  equality.

Equality.

This sits at the heart of the Humanist approach to life, as well as in its head, as the Amsterdam Declaration of 2002 states:

Humanism supports democracy and human rights.

Humanism aims at the fullest possible development of every human being.

It holds that democracy and human development are matters of right.

The principles of democracy and human rights can be applied to many human relationships and are not restricted to methods of government.

So despite my utter inability to understand intolerance, I had to set aside the complexities of history, and find my way to a clear unbiased statement:

We would encourage the Scottish Parliament to address the current disparity in the Law in the rights of same sex and different sex couples in their freedom to express their commitment to each other within the ceremonial side of their union.

Humanists think that all people have the right to emotional expression. In this context we feel that restricting an individual or couples right to express themselves within their Civil Ceremony denies them this freedom to express their values, creativity and emotional commitment, at one of the most important moments of their lives.

In addition, we would wish to see Civil Partnerships made available to mixed sex couples, who do not feel that a ‘marriage’ in the traditional sense is appropriate to their commitment ceremony or relationship.

I cried all evening when HSS Celebrant Ross Wright married Joe and Malcy on Hogmanay in 2015, and again when I said ‘You may kiss the Bride’ to the first pair of brides I was honoured to be able to marry in May 2015 (a phrase I refused to use for anyone until I could say it to everyone) the celebration of the first Civil Partnership of an opposite sex couple in Scotland is a important step toward genuine equality for everyone who chooses to celebrate their commitment to each other.

I am very very proud that - with this last stage of a 12 year project about to be concluded – I was able to make that first formal submission on behalf of the HSS, even if I’ve not been involved personally since it reached the legal stages.

I am delighted that the equality aspects that ran so deep in the original Same Sex Marriage Bill have been followed through by so many dedicated people, when much of the media concentration was on those first amazing Same Sex Wedding Ceremonies.

For a humanist, there is not much that tops a public, legal declaration that we are all equal, be that in our political, employment, educational or human rights, and levelling the privilege of Civil Partnerships to include opposite sex couples is another step toward true equality.

Thank you all.

Monday, 3 October 2016

Jan & Ruth ~ Newport on Tay ~ September 2016

Thank you very much!  It was a beautiful day for all of us. 



Everything went to plan, and everybody had a brilliant time. The ceremony went brilliantly, everybody really enjoyed the personal touches, and the weather certainly played its part too. 



We couldn't have wished for anything more. A big thank you to you!!

Saturday, 3 September 2016

Allan & Sally ~ Atholl Palace, Pitlochry

"Our  humanist celebrant was Jane Bechtel, 
we loved her on our first meeting 
 as she was so laid back 
so it set the mood from the get go."


Wednesday, 31 August 2016

Marc & Jordan - August 2016

Our grooms: Marc and Jordon! 
With hand-painted 'tux' glasses. (All the guests
got one.  Not just for the fizz, but to take home, too.)

Centre stage was the cake...surrounded by 
the Groomsmaids' bouquets.  The ladies looked 
amazing, all dressed in black, their flowers
setting the rainbow-colour theme.

The ultimate village hall transformation, 
each table in one of the theme colours.  
Talk about attention to detail!


Sunday, 14 August 2016

Jamie & Sarah ~ August 2016

Hi Jane, 

Really a heartfelt thank you from both of us on the ceremony, so many people were really touched at how personal and fitting it was and you brought a great sense of fun and calmness to the whole proceedings,  as well as some great adaptability to the weather!! And of course managing to help Sarah through her vows without the dreaded tears! 

Thanks again for helping us make it such a special ceremony which really set a great tone for a fabulous, and a little wild party to follow! 

Jamie & Sarah.

Wednesday, 6 July 2016

Jen and Craig ~ 20 May 2016 ~ Huntingtower Hotel, Perth






Craig's Vows

Jen, I love you
From the tips of my toes
to the ever decreasing hairs on my head
I love how you accept me for who I am
How you are kind and gentle
How you suport and encourage me
How you challenge and inspire us

You are the Leia to my Han
The Belle to my Beast
The angel to my cake

You are the first person I think of when I wak
The last person I think of when I go to slepp
I vow to love you when it's easy and love you more when it's not
I vow to stand by your side for our amazing journey through life
I vow to be the man you deserve

Jen's Vows

Craig, you drive me mental.
Your untidiness makes me want to pull my hair out,
Your podcasts make me want to scream,
And your casual desregard for punctuality makes me want to smack my head off a wall.
But despite all of this, I happen to love you very much.

I love the way you always know how to make me laugh.
Your constant optimism is infectious and
Your love of life is unquestioning. 
You always see the good in people,
And you always see the best in me.

Not a day goes by when I don't thank my lucky stars that we met.
The last three years have been the happiest of my life,
And I love you more and more as each day passes.
You make my life complete.

I promise to support and encourage you in all that you do,
And to love you for the rest of my days...
...To infinity and beyond.

Together:

Do you promise to share your lives with each other;
To love and protect each other;
And to always be supportive and understanding?

"We do."

Do you promise to be trusting and honest;
To comfort and encourage each other
In times of sickness and in health,
Whatever the future may hold
From this day forward?

"We Do"

...and to all our guests, today, do you, their friends and family who have loved and supported them in the past, offer your blessing for Jen and Craig's marriage, promising to support and encourage them in their lifelong commitment to each other?  If you agree, please say, "We do."

"We do."


Monday, 9 November 2015

Andrea & Tom ~ Atholl Palace ~ November 2015



As you might know, Humanists don't have a book of rules that says what a marriage should be, understanding that each marriage is as individual as the couple who are making it their own.  For Andrea and Tom, marriage means:
Accepting one another, in his or her entirety, as a lover, companion and friend.  It means caring and working for each other so that each feels loved, safe and secure.
It means to give your support, patience, and try your best to be understanding (not always easy!).
Being there for each other when the other needs it the most.  Helping with Architect exams!
It means putting a cold face cloth on Tom's head when he has a migraine...or is hungover.
Best of all, this marriage will signify a union of two amazing families, with plenty "character" (Jack's 'irn bur' kilt) and a lot of love to give.
 In committing themselves to each other in marriage, Andrea and Tom will share laughter and tears, joy and sadness...they will not belong to each other, but will belong with each other.
 They each understand that the commitment they are making today will require hard work and sacrifice on both sides, that their voyage through life together will sometimes be calm and may sometimes be story, but they know now that their love for each other will see them through.