Monday, 12 July 2021

Opposite Sex Civil Partnerships are here - at last!

 

It was the first of May 2009 that I had the terrifying privilege of submitting the response of the Humanist Society of Scotland (as we were then) to Petition PE1239 to the Public Petitions Committee of the Scottish Parliament – the Petition submitted by Nick Henderson, on behalf of LGBT Network.

The subject of petition was Same Sex Marriage in Scotland.

I was on the Ceremonies Committee at that point – as well as working as a celebrant – and relished taking on the research for and drafting of our response.

I spoke to everyone: colleagues, lawyers, politicians, journalists, gay folk, straight folk and ministers of religion. I read hate speech articles and interpretations of religious tracts, and learned far more of the shocking history of the fight for rights LGBT+ people, not just in the UK but around the world.

With far too much material and no clue where to start, I was now more determined than ever that I had to do everything I could to make this happen.

So, my priority focused on why the Humanist Society Scotland should put everything we had (money, time, volunteers, energy) behind the campaign to drive this forward - if it should get to a parliamentary vote.

I had to let all my research, academic & emotional engagement in the cause go - and think law, which is not my strong point, but I could write about  equality.

Equality.

This sits at the heart of the Humanist approach to life, as well as in its head, as the Amsterdam Declaration of 2002 states:

Humanism supports democracy and human rights.

Humanism aims at the fullest possible development of every human being.

It holds that democracy and human development are matters of right.

The principles of democracy and human rights can be applied to many human relationships and are not restricted to methods of government.

So despite my utter inability to understand intolerance, I had to set aside the complexities of history, and find my way to a clear unbiased statement:

We would encourage the Scottish Parliament to address the current disparity in the Law in the rights of same sex and different sex couples in their freedom to express their commitment to each other within the ceremonial side of their union.

Humanists think that all people have the right to emotional expression. In this context we feel that restricting an individual or couples right to express themselves within their Civil Ceremony denies them this freedom to express their values, creativity and emotional commitment, at one of the most important moments of their lives.

In addition, we would wish to see Civil Partnerships made available to mixed sex couples, who do not feel that a ‘marriage’ in the traditional sense is appropriate to their commitment ceremony or relationship.

I cried all evening when HSS Celebrant Ross Wright married Joe and Malcy on Hogmanay in 2015, and again when I said ‘You may kiss the Bride’ to the first pair of brides I was honoured to be able to marry in May 2015 (a phrase I refused to use for anyone until I could say it to everyone) the celebration of the first Civil Partnership of an opposite sex couple in Scotland is a important step toward genuine equality for everyone who chooses to celebrate their commitment to each other.

I am very very proud that - with this last stage of a 12 year project about to be concluded – I was able to make that first formal submission on behalf of the HSS, even if I’ve not been involved personally since it reached the legal stages.

I am delighted that the equality aspects that ran so deep in the original Same Sex Marriage Bill have been followed through by so many dedicated people, when much of the media concentration was on those first amazing Same Sex Wedding Ceremonies.

For a humanist, there is not much that tops a public, legal declaration that we are all equal, be that in our political, employment, educational or human rights, and levelling the privilege of Civil Partnerships to include opposite sex couples is another step toward true equality.

Thank you all.

Monday, 28 December 2020

What is a Humanist?


Early in 2020 the Humanist Society Scotland (HSS) received funding from Young Humanists International to create a short animation that explored that very question...

...and with the help of young Scottish humanists and the expertise of the animators at DaySix, they came up with a pretty good answer! 

Definitely worth a couple of minutes of your time to watch it - so you can give your guests the breakdown when they ask... and of course, if you use social media share far and wide!

Monday, 2 November 2020

When Weddings Move...

 Kirsten & Mark 10.10.20

   

Mark & Kirsten had originally picked an excellent date & unique venue out in the wilds of Perthshire at Fortingall Village Hall for their celebrations...but as with many things this year, everything kept changing. 

But at the end of all the to-ing and fro-ing they decided that the important thing was to actually get themselves married, and with that settled - and a teeny tiny gathering the only option at the time - a wedding MUCH closer to home in a place that was deeply meaningful to them was the obvious answer. 

We gathered in the sun on the Pentland Hills up above Swanston, after an easy 15 minute walk - or in Gran June's case, as hurl in a golf buggy

It was frankly blissful to be out there, windy, sunny and autumnal, with the amazing view north over the Firth of Forth.

The ceremony was simple & heartfelt, with readers from either end of the guests age range, and the occasional bemused passers by snapping a picture.

Mark & Kirsten have also planned a hooly for next year up at Fortingall as they originally planned, and they will get the frock & kilt out again, and relive some of the memories of the 'real' wedding, while celebrating their first anniversary with a wider group of their kith & kin.

If circumstances allow, I will be there too, and lead a second ceremony where we can have the readings again, and they can exchange their weddings rings and vows once more, and celebrate in a way closer to the Scottish tradition of Weddings - and to what they had originally imagined.

WARNING. I'm going to be corny now: 

It wasn't what they planned. It wasn't what they had imagined. But it was perfect. and it was perfect not because of where we were, or who was there or not there, or what I said, or what they said.

It was perfect because Mark & Kirsten love each other and got married to one another.

...and next years ceremony will be perfect too - because they will be even MORE married to each other.

~~~

                                                                                                                                         20.10.20
"Hi Jane,
We got back yesterday from a wonderful week-long break starting in Torridon and ending in a cabin with a hot tub near Nairn. We got lucky with the weather (again!) and managed to bag our first 3 Munro's as husband and wife!

We absolutely loved every minute of our wedding day and both agree that the ceremony was the highlight. Although we both started out imagining a big party, our forced change of plans now feel like a blessing in disguise as the intimate ceremony just felt so personal and perfect. So, thanks for all your effort in helping make it so special!"
 
 
 Picture below by Carley Buick Photography


Wednesday, 13 May 2020

Covid Chronicles; The Postponed Wedding


                                                            Jane Bechtel
                                                                                    Humanist Celebrant
Humanist Society Scotland

13.05.2020

Obviously, my working life mostly revolves around wedding couples.
I meet them and hear their stories, find out who they are; who their families and friends are, and how they imagine their wedding day will feel.

This may be as much as two years before their chosen date.
A date chosen so all their family can be there, from other countries, continents, deployments or shifts.

A date that might mark the anniversary of sadly passed but much loved grandparents, whose wedding bands this young couple will exchange 60 years to the day since they were last used to embody new marriage vows pledged between young lovers.

A date where their carefully chosen local venue, favourite band, photographer, piper, caterer and celebrant are all free, all excitedly booked, all prep'ed, able and willing to make this pivotal day in their lives as special and as representative of who they are as a couple, as we possibly can.

A date on which they can not now get married.

For guests a wedding is coming together, celebrating life, love, family & friends. Shared joy in the love that two people - we love - have found.
Fun & chat, too much drink & food, an excuse to buy a frock, get our hair done up - or let it down...and maybe for some guests moving a wedding it is not much more than the unfortunate postponement of a party when there are far more important things to think about.

But for many couples it is much more than a party that they have lost this year.

My couples tell me about not only how their wedding will be, but what they are looking forward to in the life and marriage that will follow that day, a day they are so excited about and that they just cannot wait for.

They have thought long and hard about what is important to them not just on that day, but in the future too, and written their vows accordingly. They have considered how to include their children or parents in their ceremony. They have poured over plans and saved their money, been measured for outfits, and had a countdown clock on their fridge for the ‘Big Day’...a big day that will not now be as they imagined.

A much anticipated marker of the joy in their lives has shifted and is forever changed. A date now marked by stress over whether or not it can go ahead? and if they do move it – when will be safe? Might it have to move again?

…and saddest of all, will there be guests who will now never get to share that long imagined moment with them, and whose absence may change everything about how they will feel about their Wedding Day. 
The original day & their new one.

I cried a little on the 9th of May. 
The couple I should have been marrying that afternoon shared a film with me compiled of clips from all their friends and family, to remind them that they are loved - and by more than just each other - and that the loss they were feeling that day was not forgotten or unimportant, no matter what else might be going on in the world.

Such warmth in that gesture. Such kindness in acknowledging that while others might be in more difficult circumstances, that does not make your feelings about your now strangely empty day any less valid.

None of us truly know how folk are dealing with what is happening in their lives, especially just now, so be kind whenever the opportunity arises.


Wednesday, 12 June 2019

Midsummer Woodland Wedding at Murthly



Both these fantastic pictures by Anna Urban

Lovely reminder just appeared from this time last year,of this stunning international occasion held for Mila & Christie up in the woods beside Murthly Castle.

The whole event was set to reflect their national colours - including me!
The ceremony was in two languages throughout, with colour coded Orders of Ceremony containing translations of most of the words spoken, so that neither the Portuguese or the English speakers would miss any of the ceremony, should that bit be delivered in the other tongue.

It took a lot of work from Mila to get that all accomplished, but I think if you had asked either of their grandmothers on the day, they would have told you it was well worth the effort!

Whole article and lots more photos in the 'Love my Dress' website can be seen here:  Love My Dress


Monday, 8 April 2019

Harriet & James at the Atholl Palace Hotel




 


Hi Jane,
I hope you are well...It honestly doesn't seem four months since the wedding!

We cannot thank you enough for helping us plan and deliver the most personal and beautiful ceremony...We have had so many compliments from our family and friends about how fantastic you were and we completely agree.
Our aim for the day was to celebrate our marriage with everyone we love but most importantly to have fun! 
We definitely managed that and a few of our photographs really capture the fun side too which I think you will appreciate!!
We could not have asked for someone more engaging, fun and kind to play such an important part in our day. 
With huge thanks and best wishes,
Harriet and James

 

Hi Guys, Lovely to hear from you, and Lovely photos - thank you so much for sending them through.  I can't quite believe that it's been four months yet either...

I'm very grateful too for your kind words. Really....as well as a bit 'Aw Shucks'...😏

It was properly fun to work with you both, and that came through on the day I think - along with a good bit your own characters in the stories and tone we went with. 
It definitly shows in the pictures too - and I suspect the party & speeches were headed down the same line!!

I would like to say thank you (again!) though, not just for choosing to work with me (and letting me put this on my blog!) but for really getting involved in getting the ceremony right. 

I can only give back what I’m given - if that makes sense? - so to get it right, it really needed you both to engage and put your own stamp on it…
I really think it was worth the effort though, and you did fab work - as well as making my job a LOT easier!!
Hugs and best wishes to you both, and no doubt see you soon-ish somewhere!

Xxx     Jane


Friday, 8 March 2019

Handfast Demonstration

Got together with my local colleagues the other week, and we all made new information and introduction films, with the cheerful, able and capable help of David Gillan the videographer ...that's him on the bottom left of my team selfie!


I suspect you'll find many of these fabby films on Facebook if you go hunting for Humanist Society Scotland Celebrants...but as I don't use Facebook for my work at all - you get to see my handfasting demonstration below.

I did another film just before the holidays with Dave too (which is the one you probably just saw on my HSS Profile) and though I do find speaking to camera super awkward, it gave me the confidence to just be myself and go for it with the handfasting one...and while neither are by any means perfect or particularly polished - they really are me just being my celebrant self, which I like! (there can be slightly more swearing when I'm being my non celebrant self!)

 

https://www.davidgillanphotography.co.uk/









Here is a photo of the final infinity knot / eternity symbol - odd colours I know, but it means that you can properly see what each strand does. Hope this was helpfull!

Sunday, 25 November 2018

Winter Sunshine

Hey folks,

Not a proper post, but a bit of fun...and some information too...

I'm off on holiday till mid December, and don't want anyone to think I'm ignoring their e-mails, so if you do get in touch, I'll get back to you as soon as I can - but unless it's urgent (hogmanay ceremony anyone!??) it will be after that.

Meantime, two movies for you to watch:
The first is all sorts of fun that was had at the wedding reception for Mel & Colin in the summer...but just in case you think that the cartwheeling celebrant just does comedy shows (yes that was me)...
I've added in the 'real' wedding film too, which gives a more realistic impression of the ceremony side of the day.
It was a properly tear filled and heartfelt occasion, beautiful words, and beautiful music too, and yes there was fun in the ceremony too, but it all revolved around who these two are as a couple - and music and fun and NOT taking life too seriously is a big part of that.

Hope you all stay cosy while I'm washing the last 6 months screen time out of my eyes by staring at the sea, and refreshing my mind with a few bad spy novels.

Thank you to Colin & Mel for letting me share these AND Mel's son for aceing the photobomb!









  




Best wishes, hope you enjoyed the films...x j






Venue was Murthly Castle Chapel: Murthly Castle


Ceremony &  'Marryoke'  produced by 'Watch the birdie' films: Geoff at Watch the birdie

Sunday, 27 May 2018

Don't Tell the Bride...


Apparently it was seven years ago today I married John & Jackie Clark, amid much drama and hilarity, trying to work round camera crews and all the rest of it - as well as a ridiculous amount of hanging about...

I haven't watched it all this time round, but did skip through to the parachute jump, and the ceremony...via the best man modelling the dress...and then had to watch to the end.

 Don't tell the Bride Program Link

If you know how the program worked, you'll know that I spent a lot of time with John, and didn't meet Jackie until just before the ceremony, so we had to be really careful with the vows, as we didn't want to make her repeat or say anything she hadn't been involved in, so we kept it super simple - but that of course was made up for by the fact that everything else was pretty OTT.

Loved these two dafties - and they went on to do some great media work for the HSS afterwards, which was done with real conviction...humanists in every aspect of their lives.

Congratulations and happy anniversary to you both!


Friday, 27 April 2018

Holiday Note

Hiya folks,
Quick message today - I'm heading off on holiday for 10 days, a pre-season break!
...BUT I understand that the vacation response from my Humanist Society Scotland e-mail may not get to you if you enquire via the HSS website - so please don't think I'm ignoring you!
I'll respond to anything urgent pretty quickly, and be back in touch on anything else as soon as I can.
Hope you have a great holiday weekend! J





Photo by my awesome sister...I just wish I knew what the Stag was thinking!

Tuesday, 2 January 2018

Lovely update from Abi & Roger

Dear Jane!

Hello - its Abi and Roger here!
You may not remember us but you married us last year at Forter Castle.

Well almost a year in a half later I finally managed to get our wedding pictures printed and as we were looking through them Roger suggested I send you a quick email just to check in and again say thank you for such a wonderful and special day!
Wow it has been a very very busy year for us since we got married.
Roger left his job and went back to university and then finished his master s and started a whole new career as an auditor working in finance!
I have been very lazy chilling at home because on the 10th July 2017 we welcomed our beautiful daughter Willow Blossom Rebecca Allum into the world ha!Attached are a few pictures.

 
Hope all is well with you and again thank you for a unforgettable magical day!

Best wishes,
Abi, Roger and Willow Allum

+++

Dear Abi, Roger and Willow,
Thank you SO much for these, just lovely, and very happy to hear you are both so happy!
I remember you very well, and have some lovely photos of you...esp' the one of you and your Dad Abi. (one of my better attempts!)
 
...and young Willow is just beautiful. Really. I might even do a wee update  on my blog if you'd be ok with me using her picture? 
 
Enjoy every second of  your time with her, and thank you so very much for thinking to write to me - I'll have BIG smiles on all day now! xxxxxx   J
 
 
 





Tuesday, 26 December 2017

Hiya Folks,
Hope you've all had a great start to the festive season,
This is a quick share in case you've not seen it yet...a montage of some of the best, strangest, funniest and just lovely bits & pieces of some weddings that my esteemed colleagues have been involved in!

New HSS Wedding Film

Sunday, 12 November 2017

Crieff Hydro with Katie & Laurie ( & Baxter the dog! )

This is just a taster of Katie & Laurie's day, as I couldn't resist putting up this wee film by David Gillan Photography, so waiting for the photos to accompany it was not an option - (now added!)

Between all the wee bits of the ceremony and the rest of the day that are shown though, you really do get an idea of the spirit of the occasion, and the warmth and humour they managed to imbue it with.......and just how much Baxter the dog means to them both!




Baxter is in fact a bit of a celebrity in his own right. Katie voluntarily runs Missing Pets Perth & Kinross and the Perthshire Dog Friendly website with places to eat with your pooch around here…and as she often puts up photos, Baxter has some pretty devoted fans - some of whom even sent congratulations cards to the Bride and Groom - via a favourite dog friendly cafe - when they read about the upcoming wedding!


BAXTER IN FULL HIGHLAND DRESS & KATIE READY TO WALK DOWN THE AISLE

Although I'd never met Katie before we started planning the wedding, I know her Mum and Step Dad pretty well, and have worked with Laurie a few times over the years...way back, Laurie worked with Katie's folks as a funeral director so we met first in that context, but he now runs the Highland Fling Bungee Jump place at Killiecrankie - and guided myself and my bungee jumping wedding couple through the safety and rigmarole of that crazy day! ( Bungee Jump Wedding! )

Katie and Laurie went for something a little more dignified - and the venue of course had to be dog friendly! - and it really was a lovely day altogether, with a very relaxed atmosphere despite the rather grand setting of the drawing room at the Hydro, the mood helped a lot by the fact that the bride was pretty chilled, and the groom more excited than nervous, and that seemed to keep everyone on an even keel!


There were lots of lovely elements to the day ( I was crazy about Katie's dress! Spot the wee Jewel on the chain down her back!) and I’ll write about more of them once I have the photos to add…but for now here is the poem that was read by Bridesmaid Robyn as they stood with their hands bound…There are several that seem to fit this spot – some serious, and some not so much – but I never tire of hearing this one read with feeling, by someone who loves them, as they think about the vows they are about to exchange…

The blessing of the hands 
These are the hands of your best friend,   
young and strong and full of love for you,
that are holding yours on your wedding day,
as you promise to love each other
today, tomorrow, and forever. 

These are the hands that will work alongside yours,
as together you build your future.       
These are the hands   
that will passionately love you
and cherish you through the years,
and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other. 

These are the hands
that will hold you when fear or grief fills your mind.
These are the hands
that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes;
tears of sorrow, and tears of joy. 

These are the hands
that will tenderly hold your children.
These are the hands
that will help you to hold your family as one. 

These are the hands
that will give you strength when you need it.
And lastly, these are the hands
that even when wrinkled and aged,
will still be reaching for yours,
still giving you the same unspoken tenderness
with just a touch.

Poem: sadly anonymous

 Video by: David Gillan Photography
 Still pictures by  Crieff Photography

Thursday, 26 October 2017

CAKE!

This is one of my favourite subjects...for all the yummy reasons I can think of...and the options and approaches that all you wedding folk take are amazing...from the exquisite delicacy of perfect sugar paste roses,  black lace or the story of your lives - to cheese & fruit, Lego cake stands, art attack projects, and my own personal favourite...the Cake Table.

where do you even start?

The cake table is (I think?) quite a new idea for weddings, and is very simple, will appeal to every single one of your guests, and is very cheap...in fact it often costs nothing at all...
You just write a list of all the best bakers who are coming to the wedding(and your aunties neighbour who does the Cherry Bakewell too!) and ask them to bring you their very best version of their very best cake...their own perfect show stopper signature cake to use the Bake Off parlance...

These are then all placed on the same table, and your guests get to indulge as they like...so if Tarte Tatin is your all time favourite, then get stuck in! Brownies? over there...individual carrot cake with a half inch of cream cheese & lime topping? oh HELL yes..

Now, I am not against traditional wedding cakes in ANY way shape or form...but as a true cake lover, I want ALL the cake, not just a sliver of one kind with my coffee, which is as much as a lot of folk want...but then I see a confection like this rose extravaganza below, and I just love the artistry and effort...and in this case, spend ages trying to take a decent picture of it!

How beautiful are these roses? Just perfect.


















Cake toppers have been getting crazier, more accurate and more fun too...Cally & Ryan pictured here had movie references throughout their ceremony so having them in the cinema with their box of popcorn made absolute sense...and the colourful ones I've seen a few of this year have been just beautiful...with the one on the right here all the flowers, toadstools and leaves were 3 D, rather than flat, and so beautifully made.



The Lego Cake stand here was the attraction rather than the cake itself...and is actually from one of my very earliest weddings, and I just found this picture in a random folder recently...which started my cake collection photo file!It really was a proper feat of engineering, and was a a cause of endless discussion before and after the ceremony...with actual arguments breaking out about the flying buttresses!




The one on the left here was a very elegant piece, and the flower were all the decor...as they were across the board that day...all the dresses, settings and the cake too were very simple and plain, but adorned with the themed flowers. A lovely idea...
and right, we have the love story of Andy & Ange, which I think I have on another post too...their dogs fell in love first on the meadows in Edinburgh under the cherry blossom...




On the right here we have 'naked' cake...with loads of cream and fruit, so actually quite simple, but looks amazing, and seriously yummy too...Then last but not least one of my all time favourites: Rainbow cake - which went with the rainbow bouquets,  rainbow table names, rainbow chair bands....
Incidentally, all the Groomsmaids were
dressed in Black - each of them carrying one of the bouquets you see here, and a matching ribbon to handfast the grooms together. Loved it!





PS: Every time I see the word CAKE in capital letters I think of this illustrated story...and now that CAKE is on my blog, I see it often.
If you have ever been a small child with a sweet tooth this may resonate with you...or if you're a parent, it may serve as a warning about the dangers of thwarting such a child...
This has absolutely nothing to do with weddings at all, and is only about the overwhelming desire for cake, but I suspect a few of you might enjoy it:
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.co.uk/2010/10/god-of-cake.html

Wednesday, 18 October 2017

What’s in a name?


Last Sunday young master Ellis Alexander Hepburn celebrated his naming day with his family and friends.
He turned one just the week before, and we ended with a truly rousing rendition of Happy Birthday, but there were lots of other elements to the occasion too, both as part of the ceremony, and the party.
I got to know Ellis’s parents a wee bit when I conducted their wedding in the Gardens at Inchyra Byre back in 2014, so was properly chuffed when they wrote asking how the Naming thing might work…which is a very good question!
 
Like our wedding and funeral ceremonies, a naming is written just for you, and will be about the child themselves in most cases, but may also be about what is important in their lives, and the lives of those around them.

They can take place anywhere, and at a time that will suit the baby or the family, or both. So Ellis’s do was at the local Bowling Club where his Granddad was a member for many years, and has been a focus of family life for a long time…
Stephanie, Ellis’s Mum even working behind the bar there when she was a student!

There is a pretty endless list of things that can happen at a naming, from words, thoughts laughs and disasters shared, to symbolic gestures, such as lighting candles, giving special gifts, or even planting a tree or making pledges or vows to the baby.
You can have a good play on the web finding things that appeal to you, but ‘usually’ we have poems, and occasionally a song, a bit about the family and the pregnancy, a bit about the Guide Parents (or Odd Parents?) if you're having any, and why they’ve been chosen, and sometimes a bit from them too, perhaps about what they are looking forward to sharing with the wee one as they grow up.
Depending on the age of the baby or child, once you know a bit about their character, it can be nice to talk about who they are becoming too, as well as how the family and parents and those around them might be instrumental in their lives at different stages. 

If the wee one has older siblings or is part of a larger or extended family group, then big sisters and brothers, cousins, step Sib's or whoever might want to take a key role in welcoming their new partner in crime.
I got together with Stephanie, Steve and wee Ellis a few months ago to talk through all that, and we came up with a shortlist of what they fancied over the cups of tea (and I even got a proper snugly baby cuddle, 'cause Ellis is friendly like that!?!), then I sent them a question list of things they’d need to think about, write or tell me, and roughed a draught out for them once I had all that - plus my notes, and we even managed to adapt their own marriage vows into their pledges to their son.

So last Sunday, that all came together with a MONSTER theme.

Awesome cake, loads of colour and a veritable ocean of children and food. There were toys and games, fizz for the grown ups and a soft play area set up once the ceremony bit was over. They also had a Time Capsule chest for everyone to put gifts into for when he's 18...so lots of imaginative and hilarious offerings in there, along with a copy of the ceremony and the certificate his parents and odd parents signed.  There was a collection too for the Sick Kids Hospital in Edinburgh, where Ellis had spent a few days as a tot.

The photos from the naming are by the lovely and very patient Kirsty McLachlan will hopefully set the scene for the wee excerpts of the ceremony I’ve put in below...link to her details is at the bottom.

A properly lovely day, and huge thanks to Steve, Stephanie and all their guests for letting me post all this, and last but not least thank you to Ellis for being so incredibly patient and cheerful at his ceremony...and I hope your Dad remembers all your guests (and your celebrant!) when you lift the Webb Ellis Trophy for the Scottish Rugby team, and he wins a monstrous huge prize on that sneaky wee wager he made at the bookies the day they officially registered your name!!

"…and we’re going to start with some advice, for Ellis from his big Cousin Skye"

Jump in puddles
Dance in the rain
Play in the mud
Don’t worry about stains

Go barefoot
Wear clothes that don’t match
Lay on the ground
Enjoy the feel of the grass

Laugh out loud
Catch a snowflake on your tongue
Enjoy every moment
Of being young
+++

Parent Pledges

Ellis, your parents promise to love & support you

give you the best of themselves
listen to you, trust you and respect you as your own person
remind you that you are not expected to be perfect
cherish & guide you
help you learn right from wrong
share with you their time and attention
show you how to respect others & the world around you
bring joy, strength and imagination to your life
encourage your dreams and help shoulder your challenges
be there whenever you need them
and laugh with you every day.

They also promise to
Let you jump in puddles, dance in the rain, climb trees and roll in the mud, 
no matter how much mess it will make
Tell you frequently how much they love you and how proud they are of you, 
 even when it makes you cringe
And, most importantly, 
never forget how lucky they are to be your parents and be the best parents they can be.

Stephanie and Steve also make the same promises to Ellis that they made to each other on their wedding day:

Ellis, today before your family and our friends
Your parents proudly acknowledge you as their son
Loving what they know of you,
and trusting what they do not yet know,
they look forward to the laughter
and falling in love with you a little more every day.
Whatever your future may hold,
they will always, always be there for you.

Stephanie and Steve, do you undertake to try and fulfil these aims?

We do

 

+++

 

Photos by

Kirsty McLachlan

http://www.kirstymclachlan.com/